Thursday, February 09, 2006

An Apology to Paris Hilton From the Plan B Manufacturers



Dear Ms. Hilton,

Many apologies, but we cannot process your recent bulk order for Plan B emergency contraception morning-after pills. Unfortunately, we do not ship over 1000 pills to individual customers. We have received your insistent e-mails and understand that you will put our products to good and frequent use; nonetheless, we have a corporate policy and must abide by it. However, as a sign of our appreciation for your incomparable product usage, we will increase your standing weekly order of 200 pills to 400.

Thank you again for your prolific business. We value all of our customers, but especially "frequent flyers" such as you.


Sincerely,
Duramed Pharmaceuticals

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