Tuesday, February 21, 2006

Hillary Duff: Please Hate Me Because I'm Beautiful, Because That Means I'm Beautiful

Dear Planet Earth,

I don't ask much of you. Really, I don't. I've been blessed with many things, including a hit TV show, a role in the instant classic Cheaper by the Dozen 2, and a voice that would make all the gods of Olympus crap themselves in pleasure. All I want is one more thing. I want you to hate me because I'm beautiful. Why? Because that's the only way I'll know if I'm beautiful. Nobody will tell me otherwise.

You see, I'm not what you would call conventionally attractive. Some have called me a Clint Howard lookalike. That hurts. It really does. I don't want to look like Clint Howard, or for that matter, any other man named Clint. I want to be beautiful. Beautiful like Ron Howard. So I ask of you, people of the world. Please hate me because I'm beautiful. You'll never tell me I'm beautiful outright, but I know that if you hate me, it MUST mean I'm beautiful, right? Right. So...please hate me. Call me the worst names in the world. Make fun of my family. I'll even let you antagonize my angular and horse-faced sister, Haylie. Whatever it takes to make me think you're calling me beautiful. I have no self-confidence and need your support.

Thank You,
Hillary Duff

Original JLH petition



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