Thursday, February 16, 2006

Sam Waterston Urges Jennifer Love Hewitt to Pose for Playboy

Dear Ms. Hewitt,

I am actor Sam Waterston. You may know me as Executive Assistant District Attorney Jack McCoy on television's Law & Order. On the show I play an unconventional (oft ruthless) litigator, infamous for bending (but not breaking) trial rules to get convictions, finding tenuous rationales for charging defendants with crimes when the original charges didn't stick, and making passionate - to the point of inflammatory — closing arguments. Earlier today I was surfing for pornography and happened to stumble across this petition. While signing the petition (editor's note: signature # 340), I asked myself how Jack McCoy would approach this conundrum. Here's what I think he'd say:

Ms. Hewitt, I urge you to think about what's at stake here with your decision. While choosing not to pose may be the easy or safe decision, it has far reaching ramifications that will be with us long after you make your choice. What's at stake is not the viewing of your wonderful bosoms, as the defense would like you to believe. What's at stake is the sanctity of the entire American judicial system. Posing for Playboy, or doing a nude scene, is a fundamental right that every female celebrity shares. I didn't make up this rule. My boss didn't make up this rule. Thomas Jefferson, and the rest of the founders of the United States of America wrote this rule into the Constitution we all know and love. By blatantly casting off this inherent right, you are essentially ignoring the Constitution. In fact, I think you are setting a precedent which may not easily be reversed. What's next, legalized rape? Murder? Child molestation? The consequences could be disastrous. Do not take the easy way out, Ms. Hewitt. You must choose to pose now, or there may not even be a later.

I guess that's really all I have to say about that. I'm proud to lend my name to this cause, just as I'm proud to support TD Waterhouse and Old Glory robot insurance. Thank you.

Best Regards,
Sam Waterston

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