Lindsay Lohan to Play Self In Upcoming Futuristic Autobiography
Hollywood, CA (ABSP) - Associated BS Press
Lindsay Lohan is set to play a “nymphomaniac waitress” in the upcoming autobiographical movie Florence. The movie takes place 10 years in the future when Lohan has been run out of Hollywood and is now scrounging for tips at a seedy diner in West Compton. Lohan has co-authored the script, which has been called "an uncanny representation of what she will eventually become." One source close to the film called her depiction of a nymphomaniac waitress as "straight from the heart" and "more authentic than a Paris Hilton STD."
Rumors around the set indicate that Lohan will perform an explicit sex scene with full frontal nudity. Producers originally asked her to do a topless scene, but she reportedly countered with a "full frontal" offer. According to one source, Lohan kept upping the ante. "First she said she'd go topless, then she offered to fully strip down, then she offered to spread her ass cheeks. At one point she even offered to whip out her wang, but the producers called her bluff. They reminded her that she's a woman and doesn't have a wang."
Lohan reportedly wants to show that she's still "got it" as both an actress and a naked slut. No word yet from the Hilton or Kardashian camps on this new challenge to their "slut authority." The former bulimic teen queen's salary has not been disclosed, but sources close to the set indicate that she's being paid in methadone as mandated by a court order.
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Tags: Lindsay Lohan, Paris Hilton, Kim Kardashian, Teen Queen, Lohan Naked, Florence